Choosing Between Logic and What Feels Right

 

Image by TheUjulala from Pixabay

At times, we overthink when making decisions. We try to read other people’s thoughts, behaviours, and intentions… we analyse data, information, pros and cons, and more…because as humans, it’s natural for us to want certainty and security.

Over time, we forget how to trust our instincts… our feelings.

We are afraid of making mistakes, of making the wrong decisions. Sometimes the reason behind this fear might be the fear of being judged, or the annoyance of having to explain ourselves to someone… and so we think that by not making any mistakes, we can avoid these unnecessary troubles. But when it still happens, we regret not following our “gut” feeling.

The moment we accept that it’s okay to make mistakes, allow our true feelings to emerge, and trust our instincts…even when they don’t look certain or promising on the surface…that’s when the real paths begin to reveal themselves.

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.
If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.

When Making Excuses for Others Hurts You More

 

Image by Mar_olivres from Pixabay

Being overly understanding can bring down one’s self-esteem. When someone breaks their promises again and again, tells us we shouldn’t want what we want, says they can’t give us what we want, and that our expectations are ridiculously high… we end up making excuses or creating reasons for their behaviour. 

Trying to be understanding when we are truly sad and disappointed can hurt us further.

Over time, we may begin to believe that we’re not worthy enough to want what we truly want.

But when we are honest about what we really want and admit our true feelings, and when we accept that not everyone is meant for us…even though we once thought they were…that’s when what’s truly meant for us begins to reveal itself, gradually.

What are you willing to trade for the things you want?

My answer is simple.

Never trade yourself.

If you'd like to explore this question through 20 everyday situations, you can find my digital guide here:

How to Live With Dignity as a Woman

[Get the Guide]

When We Stop Hiding, We See Others More Clearly

 

Image by Singha Bohrer (-Bender) from Pixabay

Sometimes hiding our true selves can prevent us from seeing other people clearly. 

There are times when we wish there’s someone who can really give us some support, 

but we’re afraid of being hurt, rejected, or humiliated…

so we act tough and strong, 

showing that we can handle everything ourselves. 

We even reject their offer when there is any.

But when we finally choose to stay true to our desires 

and accept their offer to help, 

that’s when we can see whether they’re genuine or just being nice.

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.
If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.

When You’re Not Sure What to Do, Stop Measuring and Start Feeling

 

Image by Gordon Johnson from Pixabay

When someone…especially someone close…requests something from us, our first reaction is often to measure whether their request is reasonable or doable, but we rarely pause to check with ourselves…do we actually feel like doing it? Isn’t choosing to do or not to do something…whether it’s work, tasks, or favours …supposed to come from the heart, by honouring how we truly feel about it?

When we grow up in an environment where we constantly need to prove ourselves or seek approval, over time we slowly forget that it was never about the task or the favour itself. We start bending over to please others, often out of fear…fear of losing the person, the job, the recognition of our existence… everything.

But is it worth keeping everything else, only to lose ourselves in the process?

When we need convincing, reasoning, and tons of data to support our decision, maybe it was never meant to be to begin with.

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.
If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.

Are We Attracting the Same Situations Again and Again?

 

Image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

As we live our lives, we come across many situations related to relationships, work, people, friends, or even family which have probably made us feel betrayed, frustrated, disappointed, unappreciated, depressed, and maybe even more negative emotions that we may not be able to name.

Often, we blame others for how we feel… we look for a reason, we argue for our limitations…that we can’t feel happy unless they change…only to realise that the same experiences happen again and again, even with different people or in different situations.

We feel confused and begin to wonder… why are these happening to us every time?

When similar things keep happening repeatedly, maybe it’s a wake-up call…to accept that we could be the one attracting them, which may make us feel like a failure even when we did nothing wrong.

But the real question all along could have been…

Can we strip away our pride and accept that all the external changes we ever wished for are actually coming from within?

Maybe the change we’ve been waiting for isn’t out there after all… maybe it’s quietly beginning within us.

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.

If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.

Maybe It’s Not the Job - Maybe It’s Our Heart Calling for Change

 

Image by hamonazaryan1 from Pixabay

When we were younger, what made us choose the subjects we studied? What made us choose our career paths? Maybe it was the potential income. Maybe it was the success we saw in others. Maybe we weighed the pros and cons…

There are just too many reasons…some we may not even be able to name…but have we ever asked ourselves: how do we really want to feel while doing them?

Did the job we chose bring us satisfaction and happiness?

Have we ever faked a sick leave because we were too tired or fed up with what we were doing?

Have we ever wished we could skip work altogether, without worrying about the consequences?

We feel reluctant.

We may realise we’ve been doing the same thing repeatedly and start wondering if it’s because of the company, the people we work with, the pay, or even the industry.

But maybe there’s something even more important that we’ve overlooked all along…our true feelings.

If we’re doing something our heart truly desires, wouldn’t it feel satisfying and fulfilling? Wouldn’t it feel uplifting and rewarding? Wouldn’t it feel as natural as breathing?

When doubt arises, maybe it’s time to pause and listen to what our heart is whispering to us.

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.
If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.

When Cringe Becomes Growth

Image by susannp4 from Pixabay

There are times when we cringe whenever we think about the things we did or said in the past…the way we wanted to prove ourselves better than others. We feel uncomfortable, wanting to forget what happened, or even dig a hole and bury ourselves in it altogether.

Sometimes, memories like these are simply showing us that we weren’t being our true selves at that time. Cringe can be a sign of growth…maybe even a reminder of how we had neglected ourselves back then.

Given the same situation, how would we handle it now?

How did we feel back then?

Would we behave the same way again?

Are we choosing to express… or to perform?

We often try to avoid these feelings by forgetting the past, but when they keep coming back, maybe it’s time to begin accepting them…because isn’t that what makes us who we are today?

I occasionally write personal reflections for those who want to understand their patterns more clearly.
If you’re ready to see what may be keeping you stuck, click here.